Part I: The End of Home

It’s 39 and pitch-dark, has been for hours. Always gets like this when the leaves bristle and plummet, and frost seeps into your lungs.

The cold, bleak darkness recommences with clockwork-like urgency and invariable starkness. Summer hath ended; crawl back into your concrete slabs. Continue reading


The Officially Incomplete JG Glossary

Over the past 27 years (or more accurately, 26, since we’re pretty sure we didn’t say much in the delivery room) I’ve had this compulsion – nay, pathology – of inventing my own personal manner-of-speak, often with mixed results.

Some of you find my words, phrases or idioms fairly entertaining. Guaranteed, not as entertaining as I do. For those of you that do (but, alas, mostly for me) here is a semi-definitive list of the key words, concepts and other utterances that for some reason or another have assimilated to my lexicon.

If you’re easily offended by casual racism, sexism or sophomoric humor – or if you’re Canadian – it would be deemed wise if you concluded reading at this point. This column is not for you. (Then again, are ANY of these?)

For the rest of you, we’ve included definitions so in the future, when you hear these, you’re able to follow along. This list is by no means exhaustive, and is presented in alphabetical order, with limited commercial interruption, by Toyota. Continue reading